Let's see what's hanging out up here.

Every once and a while, I need to clean out the attic of my head.  I have so many thoughts running around up there, I find it cleansing to let them out every now and then.  So let me stick my finger in the mouth of my mind and let's see what I "puke" up.

1.  If all it takes to be famous is having a bubble butt and a sex tape like Kim Kardashian, then since I already have the bubble butt, will someone please hand me the video camera?

2.  Ben & Jerry's makes so many delicious flavors of ice cream, but please, please, please let them introduce this brand new flavor:      Ben & Jerry's Playtime Playdough Paradise     Imagine how good that would smell!

3.  Okay, since they charge extra for 2x size t-shirts, why don't they charge less for small? 

4.  Why do parents insist on saying the months of theirs childs age?  Don't make me do the math.  Just tell me their FREAKING AGE.  If you ask me my age, I'm just going to tell you 504 months!!!!

5.  Was the I-Pad REALLY the best name for it?  Does it not work right every 28 days?

6.  Am I REALLY too sexy for my shirt?

7.  Why in the heck does diet food cost more than regular food?  I'm getting less ingredients right?

8.  If you play Justin Beiber's music backwards, will you hit puberty?

9.  Why is it EVERY time I use a public restroom, I always enter the stall that someone with epilepse must have just came out of and they didn't even try? 

10.  There's Team Edward and Team Jacob.  Why in the heck isn't there a Team Talent?

11.  I really need to invent a headband to wear when I'm jogging/walking that says, "I have headphones on. I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!!" 

12.  Okay, they say that the only thing left after a nuclear war will be cockroaches.  I really think we need to add Keith Richards, Ozzy Osbourne, and Dick Clark to that list.

*cough. . . . cough. . . . spit*  Okay. Purging complete.  You are now free to move about the cabin.

Smile!!!!!